Honesty lasts longer is what people say, but is it actually true? I sometimes wonder about this. I consider myself as honest as I can be but some situations ask for tact. When my mother asks me where I’ve been, I can’t tell her that I just came back from having sex with a guy I barely know? No one will contradict me (I think) for lying to her at that moment. But some situations are more difficult.
How to be honest with your friends? Also should you be completely honest? If you think your friend’s boyfriend is a douche, should you tell him or her? In my experience you should be really careful. What I do, the first time a friend complains about his or her partner, is telling my honest opinion. It can be harsh but then they know my opinion on the matter. I just say it once though. When you start saying the same thing over again it can come biting you in the butt. Also it is my experience that people often don’t want your advice. They just want someone to listen to their problems and when it’s out of their system they go back to where they left things with their partner. So I just stay clear. Why I initially say something, is because I don’t want to be a hypocrite either. I think my friends should know that I will listen to their problems but they should also know that I’m not particularly fond of their partner’s behavior.
Another situation is when two of your friends are fighting. Should you pair with the one who you think is right, or just stay away? I’ve found myself recently in that hole. Initially I didn’t want to say anything. They’d both come bitching about it and I would just listen. Now my hand is kind of forced in one direction because clearly the one friend is in the wrong. Yes, it was not my problem at first, but if someone is my friend and behaves badly toward my other friend I have to say something don’t you think? Probably I’ll be the bad guy in the end but if it is a real friend, they should be able to understand that I’m saying this from the goodness of my heart. I am not one to hurt others.
I know so many questions with no clear answers. Friendship is hard but you have to wonder when to be honest and when to not say anything. I wouldn’t lie because when you start lying, you usually can’t stop and there will always be a moment that the lie comes out and then you lose it all. So my advice would be to be honest but when it’s not possible just keep your mouth shut.